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Warning! Probable Sensitive Topic: What was your reason for attempting Suicide?
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This topic is a bit sensitive because it might lead others in the wrong way, so if it's too hardcore by all means Admins/moderators lock it.Anyway, for those of us who did at one time contemplated on ending our miserable lives, what was the cause/reason for us to attempt doing so?In my case, it was a lot of things centered on who I am & how my shallow community accepted, or rather detested me.1. My dead beat father leaving us - actually I was fine with it as he did nothing good for me, but my mom was who I was worried a lot back then.2. My disability - yes, even to this day I still ask the question of why the hell me!? But because I believe in karma, the after life & reincarnation I just see this now as a burden I must carry because who knows if this is a punishment for something I did in my previous life, or a test that once I pass will be rewarded in the next life :)3. "No body likes/loves meh!!" - whether it be the shallow minded bitches from high school, the assholes who made fun of me, my bastard father or the school itself, I felt a lot of hate back in those days. Funny thinking about it now, because the way I overcame this was "finding & accepting myself" :) Once I accepted my own awesomeness (how little it may be LOL!) & who I am, all the "need" to get attention faded away. Yeah, nowadays I don't give a shit if people don't notice me, especially in real life as a lot of people look right through me as if I were transparent even though I'm 5'9" & have a big gut & wide ass. Screw all of 'em I say. Also because of this I like being more of a loner/lonewolf than being with a crowd as I do hate "pleasing others so they'd accept you in a social real life setting.
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why would i after like 80 years you wont live anyway XP
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Replying to #2
Oh, but there are a few people who have lived over a hundred years you know.
I guess if I live over a hundred I might reconsider killing myself again ROFL!
CoolKill3r · #2why would i after like 80 years you wont live anyway XP
Be on-game..this is not to post how long people live..
I've never attempted suicide, but if I did it probably was about stress..
Replying to #4
The way I took/understood his post, I think he's simply saying he has no reason to contemplate suicide. Good for him then, as it really is the very bottom of the barrel.
Replying to #5
But this topic isn't meant for posting you don't have a reason or don't wanna to...
Cahos Rahne Veloza · #1This topic is a bit sensitive because it might lead others in the wrong way, so if it's too hardcore by all means Admins/moderators lock it.Anyway, for those of us who did at one time contemplated on ending our miserable lives, what was the cause/reason for us to attempt doing so?In my case, it was a lot of things centered on who I am & how my shallow community accepted, or rather detested me.1. My dead beat father leaving us - actually I was fine with it as he did nothing good for me, but my mom was who I was worried a lot back then.2. My disability - yes, even to this day I still ask the question of why the hell me!? But because I believe in karma, the after life & reincarnation I just see this now as a burden I must carry because who knows if this is a punishment for something I did in my previous life, or a test that once I pass will be rewarded in the next life :)3. "No body likes/loves meh!!" - whether it be the shallow minded bitches from high school, the assholes who made fun of me, my bastard father or the school itself, I felt a lot of hate back in those days. Funny thinking about it now, because the way I overcame this was "finding & accepting myself" :) Once I accepted my own awesomeness (how little it may be LOL!) & who I am, all the "need" to get attention faded away. Yeah, nowadays I don't give a shit if people don't notice me, especially in real life as a lot of people look right through me as if I were transparent even though I'm 5'9" & have a big gut & wide ass. Screw all of 'em I say. Also because of this I like being more of a loner/lonewolf than being with a crowd as I do hate "pleasing others so they'd accept you in a social real life setting.
*Joins the bandwagon*
You seem to have alot of my similarities.
Ok I wanted to attempt suicide around middle school and High School especially.I hated not being accepted by ppl.PPL always ignored me.I was always being talked about too.Also I have a disability as well.A mental Disability it's because of that I have a harder time catching onto things.So they put me in the ESE classes throughout school.But I was labeled as someone who is dumb,slow,retarded etc.PPL would try and take advantage of me because of it.But I'm not really as dumb ppl thought I was once they saw how well I can spell,read,do math etc.I just need someone to be patient with me when teaching me this stuff that's all.And I was also unhappy with the fact that I've never been with a girl before.Girls in High School are all the same,only into jocks,body builders,rich guys etc.So it just gave me the blues with me being overweight that I'd never find someone.Also about my Dad he is selfish sometimes he even left for a long time when I was a kid but he returned and never left us again.
Also my older brother was causing hell in our home as well since he's a selfish prick who thinks the world revolves around him.He's in prison now though.
Aside from all that suicide certainly was on my mind but I somehow learned to like myself more.So I no longer gave a rat's ass about the stuff that goes on.I don't care for society I know my father loves me(deep inside)I'm glad there were ppl who were patient enough to teach me.I've had girls liked me before but it was mainly in middle and elementary school.I'm not going to drop my awesome 300 lbs just to get girls.(I'm 6,1 BTW my height makes me look like I weigh less)If she can't love me for who I am then she can F*ck herself along with all the other shallow girls who only care about money,looks etc.Those kinds of girls are the ones who usually gets hurt anyway LMFAO
Aside from that my self esteem has gone up but still needs more building though.I'm still working on it.....
Replying to #7
I need to work on this one myself :)
Thanks to forums like RomUlation, I was able to go out of my safe zone & talk with people about stuff that otherwise would turn off a lot of people.
Sad thing is, the majority of people in real life are shallow minded folk so it's kind of OK for them to pick on other's obvious weaknesses because they can't cope with their own. It's something we have to learn to accept & live with I guess.
I felt really low today, I don't think I could get to the suicidal stage but my god I felt so sad something I just don't want to move out bedroom and face the cruel harsh world
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Cahos Rahne Veloza · #8I need to work on this one myself :)Thanks to forums like RomUlation, I was able to go out of my safe zone & talk with people about stuff that otherwise would turn off a lot of people.Sad thing is, the majority of people in real life are shallow minded folk so it's kind of OK for them to pick on other's obvious weaknesses because they can't cope with their own. It's something we have to learn to accept & live with I guess.
Tell me about it.PPL only take pleasure in doing this to help them feel good about themselves.
But it's nice to know that you & I seem to share the same problems especially with our weight ;D
Replying to #10
LOL!
I consider my pot belly as a badge that clearly states how much I enjoy fine cuisine, so why should I be ashamed of it? If people don't like it they can just giiiit out! ;D
I never had any suicidal thoughts but I believe the leading cause of suicide for asian people had something to do with not being able to catch up with other people academically.
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Replying to #12
I've mentioned this before on an old thread, the label Asian is too broad a label. Unlike Whites that often refer to Americans & Europeans (generally) & blacks referring to African Americans, the label Asian is very misleading. It assumes every Asian is from Chinaland when it's far from truth. Thanks to Anime, the Japanese finally broke free of the term, but the rest of us sadly are still tied to it :P
Cahos Rahne Veloza · #8Thanks to forums like RomUlation, I was able to go out of my safe zone & talk with people about stuff that otherwise would turn off a lot of people.
I know right, RomU Pwns so much!
ive thought of it as life sucks and trys to put you down
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Cahos Rahne Veloza · #11LOL!I consider my pot belly as a badge that clearly states how much I enjoy fine cuisine, so why should I be ashamed of it? If people don't like it they can just giiiit out! ;D
I go to bed and wake up asking, when would i die. I pray every night to ask God if i somehow in his good graces end my life as I sleep. And when i wake up, I ask him, when would i die and why i am still alive? Same routine.I have some soul-searching everyday, asking if there is a god, and after many days and nights, my only conclusion is, there is no God, there is no hell nor heaven, and if there is a hell, this world is already hell. Try telling someone to go to hell and i promise you, he will just stick or pop-back here.As for suicide, what is my excuse? I hate this world. I hate everybody. They have no use for me and i am just a parasite feeding on this world's resources. I even read this somewhere, i you have no use for society, you are a parasite and should just cease to exist. I never heard of a parasite being praised, they are always destroyed, mocked, humiliated. Those people who cannot take their lives ends up being a serial killer/parasite.Suicide is an escape, a self-final solution.BTW, society is a very big factor to suicide. They kill dreams and punch you in the back to reality. They kill principles, they make you conform. Thank you internet to easing the pain.
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I tried once, but passed out drunk before I got chance.
Had a bad time back then, split with my daughters mother, she took my house that my grandparents gave me, £60k and everything I owned. Wouldn't let me see our daughter. I went a bit mad, drank(a lot) everyday, lost my job etc.
Still, im glad it happened now, I learnt a lot and wouldn't be the person I am today.
One thing is certain, I will never let myself get that low again.
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I havent attempted it but i think its cause they've hit their breaking point like a person going downhill on a skate board towards a brick wall. every one has thier points and there isnt much to do for them once they hit that part but try to add pillows to the wall before they hit it.see what i'm trying to say
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horrible grades
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